The Midnight News 6.08.01
Posted By Hyatte on 06.08.01
Not much. Hart, Steiner, Savage, an 80's Icon, and Jake don't care
why are you so full of sh*t? Why do you kid yourself that your cool? You're just some Internet geek who watches wrestling to jerk off. You've got an oppinion about everything, yet I bet your one skinny bastard who fancies himself as a rebel. The funniest thing I found about your report was that you tried talking about making out with a girl, who are you kidding? The Fact that you call Bischoff a wanabe is just bull sh*t. Think about it, what the f**k are you? A skinny fagot with no future. Dont bother sending me an email telling me that your awesome, cause you coem accross as a very thick f**k. I've got your number Pal. And If I was you I'd stop taking shots at Wrestleline, this way you'll only wind up on a civil charge of
slander.
He has my number.... dear God.
Well, It's a dead news day. Very quiet. Hell, the Lariat is only 3 pages long yesterday.... with the first page being that poll of his (the survey.... not HIS "pole".... morons) and the last being that dopey "Feedback-Is-Welcome-By-Clicking-Here-I-Made-An-Extra-$50-This-Month" thing he does. Yes, it's very, very quiet. I tried hunting Zimmerman down for a vague comment or two, but he wasn't biting.
SMACKDOWN WAS ON LAST NIGHT
Yes, it hasn't been canceled yet. The 411 recap is right
here
ROOTS (THE WHITE CANADIAN VERSION)
Diana Hart-Smith, Sister of Bret, Daughter of Stu, Ex-Wife of Davey Boy, and the one girl on the planet Shawn Michaels claimed to have turned down, has been commissioned to write a tell-all.
The book will be called Under The Mat (ooh, kinky) and Fenn Publishing will print it.
Diana wasn't looking to write her autobio, but the publisher came to her first and asked. After much consideration, and a couple of Hefty Bags filled with American Dollars, she agreed.
She swears this will not be a fluff piece, this will be a real, hard look at a family and a business, both of which is male dominated, from a woman's perspective.
Growing up in a family of twelve children, in the world's most famous wrestling family, it is now Diana's turn to tell her story of how her husband and brothers are all stars in the WWF and WCW. One of her brothers died for his craft: Owen Hart, the strappy, strong wrestler died in a freak on-stage accident. Her husband, a handsome wrestler in Union Jack shorts named Davey Boy Smith (aka the British Bulldog), had taken to drug abuse. Diana's brother Dean dies of kidney failure, her sister Alison breaks up with her husband, wrestler Ben Bassarab, her sister Ellie's husband Jim Neidhart (also a wrestler) becomes abusive. Her oldest brother Smith has two children by two women at the same time, and her sister Georgia's son Matt dies of a flesh eating disease. Life becomes too much for Diana, mother of two. She begins treatment for depression, but in a desperate bid for Davey's attention, she swallows a handful of pills and almost dies
Now THAT'S a synopsis for the inner sleeve of the jacket if I've ever heard one!
Diana promises that the WWF will be treated nice.... and hopefully, Jim Ross will push it in his column. (ah, so THAT'S why The Buzz On Professional Wrestling didn't sell)
The kids at Slam
posted this.
HOLLER, IF YOU HEAR ME.... I SAID HOLLER, DAMMIT!
The Torch took a break from not spellchecking their Newsletter to report this:
Sheila Reed was in her car in Knoxville, TN one day where she was approached by Scott Steiner. Steiner reached into her car, tugged at her skirt and said "take it off, baby." Then, during the course of the molestation, Steiner also said "show it to me" and remarked that she was wearing gold panties.
Other than that, the two page suit has no further information. No where, No why, and no when.
Apparently, not only is Scott Steiner getting sued, but so is "Scott Rechsteiner"- his real name- and "Big Poppa Pump".
Chances are, Rechsteiner will have his case dismissed, Steiner will settle out of court, and Poppa Pump will PAY THROUGH THE NOSE!!!
In other Steiner related news... thanks to lack of work and plenty of WCW money, Midajah's ass has now expanded to the size of a small Donkey.
OOOH YEAH, I'M WORKING EVERY MAIN EVENT
Randy Savage has told 1Bob that he's looking to start his own wrestling promotion and blow "Hulk Hogan's ass out of the water".
He's hoping to keep the home base in Florida, and run shows overseas. He also hopes that he can get this thing going before Hogan gets his going because.... well, let's face it.... Hogan ALWAYS beats Savage to every single career goal imaginable.
Savage is looking for a few good men to get this thing going, specifically Goldberg and Kevin Nash. He'll see about coming up with the proper buyout money, but he hopes that Nash and Goldberg will join just because it would be an honor for any wrestler to work with Randy Savage.
In an amazing coincidence, both Nash and Goldberg had the same response when asked about this... "NI**A Please!"
Vince McMahon is said to have slept like a dead baby after this announcement came out.
In other Savage news, Gorgeous George had four fat, bald men climax on her during individual lap dances at Club Fantasies last week.
BUT, PLUGS
Not much. Not anything, in fact.
Sean McCluskey has recapped Smackdown for you. You can read it right
here
Keep your eyes on the great 411 Newsboard. It's the best on the Net.
TAKE US HOME, HONKY
Actually, The Honky Tonk Man sat back and let a friend of his do the talking last night. Even though he hasn't updated anything on his OWN F-ing site for months, Jake "The Snake" Roberts found the time to post THIS:
Tag Team of Booker T and his partner Akheem Michaels as he has found to a Whipping Boy also. Oh me oh my, click your heel Dorothy.
Eddie, now you know what it feels like to be that part of the equation known as 'The Example". Bite your tongue, swallow your pride, but nothing else, and possibly try the re-hab that Eric Clapton has. Perhaps I'll see you there. No...there's some people they won't let in!!
Honky you are wrong, I predict the largest Wrestlemania Gate of all time, next year when 'The Bitch is Back Match' where you must literally blow your partner away, by the way, seats will have seat buckles. The mighty Fagwell versus Jeriblo, referee by Mr. Patterson. Can you guess which one of these I have a little respect for?
As far as the King, that's spelled tiny 'k' , little 'i', chicken sh*t 'n' , and sober, baby raper 'g'. I've always wondered about this type, that maybe their genitals will only fit the youth of today, at least it keeps raincoat people in business.
Hey Honky, maybe it could be the first black tag team to be the World Champions, They could wrestle Nash and Dusty, wait a minute, there's absolutely no-one to drop the fall. Oh well, that's shot in the head!! Free Willy!! He don't wanna be free! Sometimes it's good to be a snake. Please none of you at home try this, because sometimes, Jake has a hard time being like Jake.
Man.... nothing better than wrestlers who have nothing to lose.
"Blow your partner away".... HAW
And finally....
HAS ANYONE SEEN RICKY???
From Ricky Morton's Fan Site:
5-30-01: No current news of where Ricky is wrestling. If you have Ricky booked, please email us so we can post it on the site.
What is more boggling? The fact that Ricky Morton has a fan? The fact that Ricky Morton's fan has put the time into creating a web page for him? Or that Ricky Morton apparently doesn't even help the poor shmuck?
Isn't there something SAD about that post? The guy used to be HUGE.
Ah well....
Okay, I'm going into the weekend free from YOU!! I'll be back Sunday with news and Message Board Quotes. Widro will slap something together for Saturday.
The Summer belongs to Weezer.... the Summer belongs to "Hash Pipe".
"Whoa oh whoa.... you got the big CHEESE!!!"
This is the Big Cheese too